According to the press office of the Conservatives we must not worry our pretty little heads about the fate of the NHS after Brexit. The “fact” is, they tell us, that the Prime Minister has repeatedly told us that the NHS will be safe in his hands and he won’t allow it to fall prey to US health corporations. So that’s OK then. I am sure that you will join me in feeling totally reassured after being given the word of a man who was sacked from his job, twice, for lying, who said that no Prime Minister would ever accept a regulatory border down the Irish Sea, who lied to the Queen, and who swore that he’d die in a ditch rather than send a letter to the EU asking for an extension to Article 50 before he sent a letter to the EU asking for an extension to Article 50. Boris Johnson has now lied so frequently, and with such readiness, that he’s now become extremely bad at telling the truth, and anyone who believes what he tells them deserves all that they get.
The only “fact” that anyone who isn’t Demonic Cum-mingers can see here is that whatever comes out of the mouth of Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson can be relied upon about as much as you can rely on BBC Question Time not to have an audience stuffed full with elderly Brexit supporting Tories with English accents when they’re broadcasting from Dundee. Absolutely nothing that this sorry excuse for a government says or does can be counted upon to last a nanosecond longer than a change in their assessment of whatever they believe to be in their short term interests. Although this does assume that they’re saying the same thing to everyone, and there is every reason to believe that they’re not. It’s a safe bet that Number 10 is not spinning the same yarn to the Brextremists of the ERG as it is to those idiotic Labour MPs from leave voting seats that it’s trying to get on board with this disaster of a deal.
Today, the Government suffered yet another humiliation in the Commons due to the fact – there’s the correct use of that word there for you, Conservative spin office – that nae bugger can trust a single thing that the Government says or does. The Speaker refused to allow the Government another shot at its meaningful vote on the deal, since they had a chance on Saturday but blew it on account of being liars liars pants on fire. Instead the Withdrawal Agreement Bill will be published late on Monday, and put to the vote on Tuesday, giving MPs ample opportunity to make all sorts of amendments to it which, to paraphrase the words of the Japanese Emperor as he announced his Empire’s surrender in WW2, may cause events to not necessarily progress to Boris Johnson’s advantage.
MPs may force a change to the deal obliging the whole UK to remain within the EU customs union, and / or they could make the entire sorry mess subject to a confirmatory referendum. The reason that the Government was so desperate to get its deal passed in a simple meaningful vote on Saturday, and then tried again today, was that it would have prevented MPs doing exactly this. This Government is now facing the consequences that were spelled out by the German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, “I’m not upset that you lied to me, I am upset that from now on I can’t believe you.” Incidentally, this is a philosophical aphorism which will likewise bite the bum of Better Together MkII in the next Scottish independence referendum. No wonder they’re so desperate to prevent us having one.
Meanwhile in Scotland, the Court of Session has decided to delay making a ruling in the “nobile officium” case brought by the SNP’s Joanna Cherry, the legal campaigner Jolyon Maugham, and the anti-Brexit businessman Dale Vince. The court’s senior judge, Lord Carloway, said that the court needed to be certain that the Prime Minister hadn’t tried to block or sabotage the letter he was forced to send asking the EU for an extension to Article 50. In a move more typical of a small child having a temper tantrum than the Prime Minister of the UK, the letter to the EU asking for the extension wasn’t signed, and was followed by another letter saying, in effect, “Please ignore that first letter because those mean kids made me send it.” This does seem pretty contemptuous, in all senses of the word. It’s a bit like putting in a request for a mortgage, and then following it up with a letter saying that you’re only going to spend the money on cocaine. Which come to think of it, certain members of this Government have previous for. The Prime Minister’s petulence does look to me like an attempt to block or sabotage the application for an extension, but then I’m not a judge.
I get where the judges are coming from. It’s only reasonable to seek greater certainty than a whole load of Scottish people on Twitter saying “G’wan, send the bastert tae Barlinnie, jist fur the shits and giggles,” when you’re a heid bummer judge at the Court of Session and you’re deciding whether to hold the Prime Minister in contempt. But g’wan, send the bastert tae Barlinnie. It’ll be a laff. Although this is not the opinion of a whole load of very irate Brexity people in the comments section of the BBC’s digital piece on the story, who are not at all happy that a Scottish court is daring to intrude on “their” Brexit. How very dare those uppity Jocks with their own courts and legal system get in the way of England’s Brexit.
I hope that everyone in Scotland is feeling the love following the country’s No vote in 2014. It was JK Rowling who said that if Scotland voted No we’d be in the heady position of a wife who was thinking about leaving but who had then changed her mind. The implication was that we’d be able to get pretty much anything we wanted from the almost spurned but not phew that was a close shave husband of Westminster. But then this is a fantasy writer, so what did we expect really?
Anyway, this is my last blog post until I get back from the USA visiting with my husband for our first wedding anniversary. Fingers crossed he’ll be living over here in the not too distant future. There will be a couple of guest posts while I am away to keep you entertained and edificated, if that’s a word. I’ll be back ranting as usual next week.
It’s going to be a relief to leave the craziness of Brexit for a wee while and only have the relative sanity of Donald Trump’s likely impeachment to dominate the news I’ll be seeing. I wish I could say that Brexit will be sorted by the time I get back, but naaaa. So instead I will leave you with this thought – every extra day of confusion, every new incidence of UK Parliamentary mess and delusion, every time Boris Johnson opens his lying gob, more voters in Scotland say to themselves, “Bugger this for a gemme o sodgies” and resolve to vote yes next time. The next time you feel weary and worn down by infighting, by SNPbaddery, by doubts and fears, just remember – we’re winning.
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