Jo Swinson’s shiny ego

The Labour party’s mostly invisible branch office manager in Scotland, Reginald Lapdancer, might once have had the fond belief that being a Corbyn loyalist meant that the Jezza would be loyal in return. He has discovered that he was sadly mistaken. Or not so sadly if you’re not one of the tattered remnants of what’s left of the Labour party in Scotland. The party leader has said this week that it’s not up to the UK parliament to block a Scottish independence referendum. So, that’s you telt then, Randalf Loglauncher.

Jeremy Corbyn thinks that another Scottish independence referendum is a bad idea. He’d campaign against independence. He’d stomp the land along with the rest of them, warning of doom and devastation and deficits. All of which is fair enough. It’s perfectly fine to oppose Scottish independence, what’s not fine is to prevent the people of Scotland from debating it in a national referendum when they’ve elected a Scottish Government with a mandate to bring one about. So Jeremy doesn’t agree with the Labour branch office which wants Westminster to overrule the Scottish Parliament when the Scottish Parliament doesn’t agree with the Labour branch office. My god. Someone in Westminster gets democracy. Well, sort of.

There is of course a bigger picture here. Partly it’s the realistic electoral calculation that Labour’s Scottish contingent in Westminster is expendable. And you only have to look at Lesley Laird to go, “Well, OK. Fair enough,” to that last point. Lesley is apparently the Shadow Scotland Secretary and is supposed to be taking the lead on Labour’s Scotland policy at Westminster. However her sole distinguishing feature in Scottish Labour politics is that she has an even lower public profile and recognition than branch office manager Roderick Lambworrier. That, and she’s not Hugh Gaffney, who is only remarkable for his ability to embarrass himself. Apart from Ian Murray, who pops up on the telly from time to time to be hypocritical about whether there ought to be referendums, even those of us who are dedicated Scottish politics geeks would struggle to name the other Labour MPs who represent Scottish seats. Most of them would fail to make an mark if you gave them a big rubber stamp and an ink pad.

The Labour leadership has clearly calculated that getting the SNP to support Labour budgets is going to be far more important to the stability of any future Labour government than getting more Labour MPs in Scotland. Giving current polling, Labour is going to be extremely lucky to hang on to a single seat, Ian Murray’s. And Ian is as much a thorn in the flesh for the Labour leadership as he is for just about everyone who has the misfortune to hear him harrumphing on the telly.

The reason that he’s made the announcement now is that it is all a part of Jeremy Corbyn’s strategy to get the minority Westminster parties to agree to back him in a vote of no confidence against Boris Johnson. The plan is that Jeremy would become Prime Minister for a limited period, in order to ensure that the UK avoids a no deal Brexit.

Jeremy’s plan has however already been shot down in flames by Jo Swinson. The only thing that remain voting Middle England dislikes more than Brexit is the idea of Jeremy Corbyn in Downing Street. There’s no way that Tory in drag Jo is going to be seen to back a Jeremy Corbyn government. Not even if it’s to prevent a no deal Brexit. Not even if it’s time limited. Not even if he’s going to be prevented by parliamentary arithmetic from introducing the left wing measures that he’s promised his supporters. Jo has instead suggested that the temporary government be headed by Harriet Harman, because it’s up to Jo Swinson to decide who gets to be the leader of the Labour party.

The reason for the refusal is twofold. Firstly it’s because Jo has her eye on Tory – Lib Dem marginal seats in the snap General Election which is widely predicted, and Jeremy is as toxic with Tory voters as the Lib Dems were with students after they did a U-turn on tuition fees. A U-turn which Jo voted for. It’s going to be very difficult for the Lib Dems to attract the votes of remain leaning Tories, who do actually exist, if they have been seen to prop up a Jeremy Corbyn administration.

Secondly it’s because Jo knows that the price of a temporary Corbyn administration which also requires the backing of the SNP is another Scottish independence referendum, which buggers her career. You can’t be a party leader in Westminster when you represent a seat in a country that’s independent of the UK. It’s only referendums which produce a result that Jo doesn’t like that ought to be rerun. The Lib Dems want a government of national unity, but only with those people that they think it’s politically advantageous to unite with.

So that’s the Lib Dems there, putting the interests of their party ahead of the interests of the UK as a whole. They certainly learned the lesson well when they were in coalition with the Conservatives, didn’t they. “We haven’t got time here to muck about with people’s egos,” said Jo as she burnished her shiny ego.

Time is running out here. If there is to be a grouping in Westminster which can oppose a no deal Brexit, it is only logical that it should be led by the leader of the opposition. Parliamentary arithmetic alone means that Jeremy Corbyn will not be able to introduce any measures which don’t enjoy cross-party support. Even a number of Conservative remainers is willing to meet with Labour to discuss the idea, yet Jo Swinson and the Lib Dems are still set against the idea.

The way Westminster works is that if a government fails to win a vote of no-confidence, then it’s the leader of the opposition who has the right to try to form an administration. If he or she can’t, then there’s a general election, that’s how it works. It’s not up to Jo Swinson to decide who the leader of the opposition is. It’s not up to a minority politician like Jo Swinson to unilaterally rewrite what passes for a British constitution. But then we’re talking here about a politician who preaches Liberal Democracy but practises neither. Her refusal to countenance doing a deal with Labour only makes a no deal Brexit more likely, and that in turn makes it even more likely that Scotland will turn to independence as the only means of escape. Jo Swinson’s selfish short-termism is yet another nail in the coffin of the UK. Be careful what you wish for, Jo.

newbook My new book has just been published by Vagabond Voices. Containing the best articles from The National from 2016 to date. Weighing in at over 350 pages, this is the biggest and best anthology of Wee Gingerisms yet. This collection of pieces covers the increasingly demented Brexit years, and the continuing presence and strength of Scotland’s independence movement.

You can order the book directly from the publisher. Ordering directly means that postage is free. You can order here –

You can also order a book directly from me. The book costs £11.95 and P&P is an additional £3.50, making a total of £15.45. To order just make a Paypal payment to, or alternatively use the DONATE button below. Please make sure to give me your postal address when ordering. Orders to be sent outwith the UK will incur extra postage costs, please email me for details. If you can’t use Paypal, or prefer an alternative payment method, please email

You can help to support this blog with a Paypal donation. Please log into and send a payment to the email address Or alternatively click the donate button. If you don’t have a Paypal account, just select “donate with card” after clicking the button.
Donate Button

If you have trouble using the button, or you prefer not to use Paypal, you can donate or purchase a t-shirt or map by making a payment directly into my bank account, or by sending a cheque or postal order. If you’d like to donate by one of these methods, please email me at and I will send the necessary information.

Please also use this email address if you would like the dug and me to come along to your local group for a talk.

GINGER2croppedGaelic maps of Scotland are available for £15 each, plus £7 P&P within the UK for up to three maps. T-shirts are £12 each, and are available in small, medium, large, XL and XXL sizes. P&P is £5 for up to three t-shirts. My books, the Collected Yaps Vols 1 to 4 are available for £11 each. P&P is £4 for up to two books. Payment can be made via Paypal.

38 comments on “Jo Swinson’s shiny ego

  1. Bob Lamont says:

    Yup, wouldn’t disagree with a word of that.
    The Westminster power games are like cocaine, what the practitioners fail to realise in their stupor, is the public are sick to death of their self-serving deceptions.
    The Antichrist of Corbyn has been carefully nurtured by the Tories in the public mind, yet he remains more trustworthy than Swinson whose confidence is as much a pretence as her accent.. Few will sympathise when she falls on her face at the next GE…

  2. katherine hamilton says:

    HI Paul
    I also like the analysis. However given the boost to independence she is giving with her suicidal tactics, I would have finished with “Thanks, Jo”.

  3. Margaret Noakes says:

    Still loving your R.L.names.Can I add Romeo Lickspittle ?Wonder how long he will do a Mundell ?! Hope the dug enjoyed his treats.x

  4. panda paws says:

    I could name Ged Killen (because I think it’s a funny name if not quite Ranulf Leotard levels) and Danielle Rowley because of her dad’s not so private life and his links to Gordon Brown Unfortunately for BLiS I didn’t know them because of anything they had achieved since becoming MPs!

    As for Swinson, she’s voted with the Tories post coalition more often than actual Tory MPs have.

  5. Billy Watt says:

    If the Prime Minister is the person who can command the confidence of the house then I’d have to say that Jo Swinson might be right.

    There’s nothing that says the person has to be a party leader

  6. welshsion says:

    Draft version – with acknowledgements.

    Joanne Swinson – you’re nae my jo

    Joanne Swinson – you’re nae my jo.
    When we were first acquent,
    You were ain young Liberal,
    Wi’ aw’ your principles spent.
    An’ now you’re aulder, Jo,
    Wi’ newer principles, mich like the snaw;
    Which when come yon spring, doth thaw.
    Joanne Swinson – you’re nae my jo

    Joanne Swinson – you’re nae my jo.
    We’d never work thegither;
    And manys a cantie day, Jo,
    We had wi’oot ane anither:
    Now I maun to gae my way, Jo;
    Free o’ you – to indy, I maun go,
    An’ be rid of better thegither.
    Joanne Swinson – you’re nae my jo.

  7. Legerwood says:

    Just watched Ms Swinson being interviewed on Ch4 news. Heavens above. Words fail me. It is not on their web site yet but should be later if you want to have a look.

  8. Petra says:

    Talk about too many cooks spoiling the Brexit broth. Who’s in charge now? Johnston or Corbyn? No, it’s Jo Swinson leader of 13 LibDem politicians at Westminster. Beggars belief.

    ”Asked if either of the politicians (Harman and Clarke) had been approached about this, Ms Swinson said she has “been in contact”, and praised the long-serving MPs for their “sense of public duty”. She added: “I’m confident that if that’s what the House resolves, that those individuals would be happy to take on that role to try and steer our country through these difficult waters.”


    Hi Legerwood. Waving to you from the ether, lol.

    • Legerwood says:

      I was hoping CH4 news would have contacted Clarke and Harman to ask them for a comment. A missed opportunity.

      But it was an interesting segment of the interview and she was really pushed on her contact with them and their response. Watching her replies and her demeanour suggested that the contact with them and their response to her proposal was not as concrete as she suggested.

      Waving back

    • Cubby says:

      Hope it’s not too cold in that ether stuff.

  9. Macart says:

    Neatly done Paul and couldn’t agree more.

    Heh. Ms Swinson is about to become as popular as a fart in a lift with cross party progressives all through the Commons. Also pretty sure that remain voters the length and breadth of these islands may have had a bit of a ‘Wait whut?’ moment. Mind you, given her voting record… the term progressive and Ms Swinson won’t often be seen in the same sentence. 😎

  10. Les McDonald says:

    Thoroughly enjoying the ever changing persona of the lab twig leader. Could I suggest Remington Lilliput be added to your list.

  11. Lynn Fraser says:

    Great article. She drives me crazy with her god awful womansplaining. She speaks in a way that its like your thick and she has to be really slow and accentuated so you can keep up.

    Best wishes,

  12. Alba woman says:

    Jo Swinson is your archetypal Lib Dem politician….very, very status quo conservative pretending not to be.

    She voted for all the austerity measures of the horrendous George Osborne. People’s lives have been cut short by the effects of these austerity measures Jo…no blustering rhetoric will save you from that reality.

  13. Millsy says:

    Jo Swinson – the King maker . As I said on The National comments – this is a Hard line Tory in all but name .
    She supported them in 2010, and has continued to vote for hard line Tory policies on Welfare cuts and Austerity . She is a despicable wolf in wolf’s clothing !

  14. Petra says:

    Agreed. Swinson is a Tory in disguise Millsy. Her record is totally inline with the Tories, but will she ever be found out? Will the MSM expose her?

  15. ArtyHetty says:

    Swinson, dreadful nasty piece of work. She’s been helicoptered in as if her yellow Tory party were actually of any importance, and once again, like untRuth of actual Tory party, is given a platform, manufactured by the dodgy media.

    She is so plastic, and so false, and it sounds like has been taking lessons in what to say when questioned. It’s an act these people put on, and Westminster is a farce, but soon it will be a dark comedy, sinister, frightening, hide behind the settee scary.

    Really, when you think about it the whole of the last 3 years, since the stupid Brexit referendum, politics in the UK has been unhinged. Those responsible for the sheer mess taking place now, are an utter disgrace. The money it has cost us, the distraction from crucial matters like the future of the planet, Tory austerity, and the poorest, most vulnerable people being plunged into destitution is just totally immoral.

    Do the rich have a planet B to go to? Because anyone would think so. Let them have the ‘red planet’, they will surely get their comuppance there. Hpw many hours, days, weeks and months and now years has this farce been being played out?

    Swinson works only for her self interest, it’s so obvious. Corbyn has now all of a sudden decided Brexit might be a bad thing? Which planet? He is too late.

    Scotland, save yourselves, or get a very big settee, it’s going to be scary as heck.

  16. bringiton says:

    Just another unscrupulous,unprincipled politician on the make.
    Taking a stance/chance on whatever is most likely to benefit themselves primarily and to hell with everyone else.
    Can’t blame them for that,it is the nature of the beast.
    The people who vote for them however are another matter all together,Orkney comes to mind.

    • Bob Lamont says:

      But is this not the electorate’s problem, the “Can’t blame them for that,it is the nature of the beast” attitude prevails as the standard by which politicians are now held, and in some quarters it is even perceived as increasing chances of promotion?
      20 years ago Johnson as PM would unconscionable, Yaxley-Lennon would never have gotten near a crayon for the MEP application form, and Nigel Mirage would be a rank outsider (Raving Monster Loony Party?) instead of heading a company fielding MPs which will likely hoover up English votes at the next GE.
      SNP may have had their problems, but at least they held to standards, and with Westminster lurching ever farther right, Swinson will feel quite at home, indeed her home is down south now.
      That does not mean the Scot’s electorate cannot expect and demand better of their elected representatives…

  17. Juteman says:

    I love the pish getting ripped oot o’ Reedlin Lendrum.
    When someone becomes a figure o’ fun, they are finished.

  18. Andy Anderson says:

    In general politicians are a fickle self centred lot who’s only mantra seems to be me, me, me. There are exceptions but not that many who get air time.

    Jo seems to have gone through life knowing next to nothing about Scotland, her town or indeed politics. She is proving herself to be yet another Unionist numpty. Maybe her title should be changed from MP to LB (lying b).

  19. Jo Swinson has no political convictions. She chose LibDem for the same reasons Tony Blair chose Labour – they both realised that in the prevailing conditions of the time neither of them stood a chance with the Conservatives.
    By the way, is it my imagination or does Ms Swinson’s accent swing between educated West of Scotland privileged schoolgirl and overtones of Ambridge? The accent seems wobbly at times.

  20. Craig P says:

    >>Tory in drag Jo

    Ouch, and lol 🙂

  21. Macart says:

    Still chuckling over ‘Randalf Loglauncher’. 🙂

    There’s an NPC in there for a game if ever I saw one.

  22. Grafter says:

    Enough of this chattering ! Get off your backsides and come to Aberdeen tomorrow. March starts 1.30pm Albyn Place.
    Lord Provost Crockett will be flying his union flag above the Townhouse. Let’s show them where to stick it.

  23. Iain says:

    Apart from Chieftain of the Pudding Race, Councillor Gaffe and the woman claiming to be a Shadow, I’ve heard talk of a Labour MP called Paul something who enjoys tweeting drivel. This, however, may only be groundless tittle-tattle.

    • Bob Lamont says:

      No, his drivel is groundless tittle-tattle.. His brief tenure as Jim Murphy impersonator will end at the next GE, but there is an uncanny link between the numbers graduating in Economics and Political Science and verbal diarrhoea, perhaps post independence we might lean toward proctologists, hence marrying brain with teeth… 😉

  24. Petra says:


    ”Corbyn’s letter and timing have offered the country a real chance to avoid a no-deal exit – but he has also painted centrists into a corner where the vast majority of them are exposed as hypocrites. Now that they have a chance to have what they’ve been shouting for, suddenly the fact is exposed that it was always about blocking Corbyn, not about blocking Brexit.

    LibDem leader Jo Swinson told cameras minutes ago:

    ”I want to be very clear this morning. I’m determined to do whatever it takes to stop Brexit.”

    But, self-evidently and self-servingly, that is clearly untrue – as the rest of her speech put beyond doubt.”


    @joswinson Can you confirm that you HAVE NOT been in discussions with @BorisJohnson specifically between the 9th – 12th of this Month of August ? Cause nothing gets passed the Nats. A simple YES or NO, will suffice. I’ll wait, but not too long.


    Aforementioned links taken from Nana Smith’s excellent site.

  25. Terry callachan says:

    Ben, I think it would have been the same when England sent soldiers around Scotland to quell the disquiet amongst Scottish people following the union of 1707
    possibly worse because there were no tv radio newspapers etc to report their behaviour

  26. Melvin says:

    Fantastic analysis of Jo wind as she blows any way that suits her to gain Tory votes in England, she is despicable and the archetypical liar politician, full of self importance and flip flopping to suit the changing climate. Horrible with no sense of direction other than her self importance. Changes her accent to suit her audience and changes her policies to suit her bank balance and ego. She has no substance and no moral centre.

  27. diabloandco says:

    Just the insincerity dripping from every distorted vowel puts me off.

    I also reckon she is employing the Ruth the Mooth’s interview technique – if you can’t answer the question give an’ SNP Bad’ monologue.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s