Broonterventions in BDSM Britain

winnertakesall

There’s been a Broontervention. This one was distinguished by one thing only, no one was trying to pretend that this was the first. Not even Reporting Scotland. This time the last living dinosaur was broontervening on a range of topics, which is a polite way of saying that he was lashing about all over the place without much in the way of a train of thought. The theme, such as it was, uniting his speech was that the UK was at risk of going to hell in a handbasket if it didn’t listen to him. Since the UK ceased to listen to Gordie quite some time ago, and he has spent the time since in an almighty sulk, it’s understandable that he might not have noticed that the UK is already a long way down in its descent into hell in a handbasket.

According to the reports in the press Gordie was mostly broontervening about Nigel Farage’s funding and the dangers of right wing populism. You have to rely upon reports in the press whenever there’s a broontervention, because the event itself invariably takes place in a closed and shuttered secret venue in front of an audience of individually invited and carefully vetted Labour hacks from the Cretaceous wing of the party and a smattering of press persons. Apparently that’s what makes it public.

It never manages to cross Gordie’s mind that one of the reasons so many people are, unfortunately, attracted to snake oil salesmen and charlatans like Nigel who rely upon dodgy funding from shadowy and powerful sources is that they’ve already been disenchanted from traditional politics by politicians like Gordie and the New Labour project who turned out to be snake oil salesmen and charlatans who relied upon funding from shadowy and powerful sources.

Naturally Nigel responded by pointing out that New Labour’s own fundraising strategies were not exactly devoid of controversy. He also claimed, with the rampant paranoia and sense of victimhood that characterises Brexiters, that it’s all a dastardly plot by the elites to do down the little guy. Nigel’s claim to represent the little guy against the elites would have rather more traction if he wasn’t a middle class stockbroker with an MEP’s salary who is living in a multi-million pound house in Chelsea with a personal driver and a luxurious lifestyle funded by his millionaire backers, but don’t expect consistency from the Brexit party. Don’t expect a manifesto or any policies either. The Brexit party is populism in its purest form. By promising nothing except a howl of outrage against claimed victimhood, they can appeal to everyone. And no one can claim victimhood like those who fear that their privileges are under threat.

The claims and counter claims about Nigel’s funding does raise a question. The question is, is it more or less morally reprehensible to fundraise from shadowy and hidden business interests in return for unknown influence, than to fundraise from business people in return for peerages and unknown influence like New Labour did. Discuss. Actually, there’s no reason to discuss it much since they’re both equally bad, and both equally demonstrate the moral vacuum at the heart of British politics. It’s not much of a defence to point out that you’re just as bad as the guy who’s accusing you.

The other part of Gordie’s broontervention was an attack on the SNP for wanting independence. It’s not a proper broontervention unless Gordie is telling Scotland how crap it would be at governing itself. It might not come as a surprise to many the revelation that the SNP wants an independent Scotland. It does however appear to have come as a surprise to Gordie. He’s shocked to discover that the SNP want what he describes as a hard independence, which is his description of the possibility that an independent Scotland would move to adopt its own currency after a period of using Sterling unilaterally. His shock and horror would be more understandable if it wasn’t for the fact that he was one of the people ruling out a currency union between an independent Scotland and the rest of the UK. So what exactly was he expecting? Presumably that the SNP would say, “Oh well. We’ll just give up on all this independence malarky then.”

Meanwhile back in London the real and pressing reasons for Scottish independence were being articulated in a speech by Theresa May. In a last ditch desperate attempt to rescue her deal that’s already been rejected repeatedly by the Commons, Theresa announced that she wanted a Brexit that works for everyone. Which is a bit like saying that you want to be murdered nicely instead of horribly without recognising that there’s the option of not being murdered at all. She presented what she was pleased to call a new deal, and said that she’d been listening to everyone. Well everyone except Scotland and the 48.2% of the UK electorate which voted to remain. She offered concessions to a Northern Irish Assembly which hasn’t sat for two years, but nothing at all to a Scottish Parliament which has rejected her Brexit plan by a large majority.

Her new deal includes some new waffle on the Irish backstop. It includes a promise to have a vote on another referendum providing the deal passes first. It promises a few enticements for the DUP, a few more for Labour leavers. It promises rainbows, unicorns, and butterflies.

Crucially what her new deal didn’t do was to make it conditional on a confirmatory referendum. That would have ensured its passage through the Commons, but it’s too toxic for her party. Even now, even at this late hour, Theresa May is still continuing to put the interests of her party first. This new offer is an attempt to get the DUP and Labour MPs from Leave voting constituencies to bail her out. That’s not going to happen. Labour has already ruled out supporting the deal because it doesn’t offer a permanent customs union. In an interview Jeremy Corbyn said that Theresa May hasn’t changed her red lines, which was the reason that talks between Labour and the Conservatives broke down.

She’s left it too late, and she’s not going to be around to deliver any sort of deal even if by some miracle she manages to get it through Parliament. It was telling that all that the journalists wanted to ask her when she took questions after her speech was about when she was going to resign. The reaction from Tory MPs in the immediate aftermath wasn’t positive. The usual Brexiter suspects lined up to say that they’d not support it. But it was even worse, some Tory backbenchers like Andrew Percy and Simon Clarke who voted for the deal the last time say that now there’s no way they will support it. If Theresa May’s new offer is alienating even those who supported her last time there is no hope for her. She promised a game changer, she got game over.

Brexit, she said, was a great time to be alive. It’s like that Chinese curse, may you live in interesting times. But here we can agree. Brexit is a great time to be alive if you believe in Scottish independence, because Brexit represents the final fall into senility of the ageing and decrepit British state. It’s a descent into the reveries of nostalgia, a claim to victimhood from a former empire that wants to believe it’s being treated like a colony by the EU. We’re now looking at a no deal Brexit, no Brexit at all, a referendum, or a general election.

The reason for that belief is entrenched deeply within the political structure of the UK. In Westminster politics there are only winners and losers, there are those who dominate and who command and those who are subordinate and who obey. There is no place for compromise, no understanding of collaboration. If the UK can’t dominate the EU, then it must be the EU’s colony. That’s the only paradigm that British politics understands. British politics is the ABBA song writ large, The Winner Takes It All. Whether Brexit happens or can be forestalled, Brexit and the sense of British victimhood will continue to dominate politics in the UK for generations to come.

Brexit teaches Scotland that since it cannot dominate the UK, then it is to be subordinate, subservient, and submissive. That’s our place in this so-called union, and that’s why the only escape route from Brexit and the BDSM fetish that is British politics is independence. No number of broonterventions will alter that fundamental truth.


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25 comments on “Broonterventions in BDSM Britain

  1. Cubby says:

    Small correction 7th paragraph down say should be sat – regarding Stormont.

  2. […] Wee Ginger Dug Broonterventions in BDSM Britain There’s been a Broontervention. This one was distinguished by one thing only, no one […]

  3. Anne Martin says:

    So, the SNP are now going for a ‘hard’ independence are they? What in heaven’s name does that even mean? Crawl back into your hole please Gordie! 😡😡

    • Charles McGregor says:

      Scotland are going for the easiest of easy independences – by staying in the EU.

      That way all we have to do is sit back and let the EU and London decide whatever deal if any will pertain between rUK and the EU.

      No effort required. or even possible, on iScotland’s part.

  4. Millsy says:

    Is Gordon Brown senile ? I ask this in all sincerity . The man used to be a colossus in the Labour Party , a real thinker , a man of ideas . F*ck me , he was even PM !

    Now he is a sad , rather dishevelled figure who is wheeled out by those astute ( don’t laugh at the back ! ) Labour Party gurus who think that a ”Brown intervention” will have some traction with the electorate .
    Unfortunately the voters, like all of us when faced with a ”Brown intervention”, think ” Oh , Shit ! ”

    Brown speaks to a few select people who , one presumes , have been innoculated against the pretentious BS that he spouts , particularly when he talks about ‘North Britain ‘.

    He is never allowed to meet people who might tell him one or two home truths about his part in the continuation of Tory rule in ‘North Britain ‘ or how his association with Blair and Iraq has reduced the once great Labour Party to an unprincipled , unelectable , middle-class , Tory-lite bunch of self-seeking arses !

    If Brown cannot see what most of us see then , as I said earlier , he is senile .

    • astytaylor says:

      Well said, Millsy.

    • Iain says:

      He only ever seemed like a colossus because he was surrounded by midgets.

    • I don’t think that the snap of Clunking Fist with The Dick Leotard is actually Broon.
      It looks like his old Madame Tussaud wax replica has been left to near a radiator in the Basement storage unit and started to melt..
      I’m host to Canadian relatives this week, so my eye is offish the ball, but, for what it’s worth, May will resign on the strength of the MEP election exit polls tomorrow night. She won’t wait until Sunday night.
      ‘Big T’ is no longer Ruth chubbier and more cheekily grinning than ever, is going to let Boris drive her home from the party after all.
      Carmichael on Brewer’s droop attempted to justify a Second EU Referendum as not a second referendum at all, but a People’s Confirmatory Vote on the terms of whatever Brexit Deal (None) the WM whorehouse can cobble together, whereas a second Indy vote was a No No because the People voted No in 2014, and that according to LIar Carmichael is final.
      Surely those who voted No in 2014 expected to be a full partner and equal and loved and leading, well, until 07.00 hrs on 19th Septemebr 2014, when Cameron announced EVEL but Clunking sstill pledged the most devolved Home Rule Parliament in the known universe, and beyond, if you live in Lord George Robertson’s Twilight Zone, and Paul Sweeneyand Iain Davidson sheathed his bayonet and ‘vowed’ that 13 frigates would be built on the Clyde and Rosyth, and David Cameron would protect Scotland from financial ruin by carrying us on his broad shoulders with every fibre of his being until the day he died, or resigned, whichever was the earlier.
      Surely Indyref1 No voters should get a People’s Confirmatory Vote now that the Vow terms and conditions are known?
      They might opt for independence in a People’s indyref Confirmatory vote.non?
      I see Mundell has asked for a quiet word with Big T today.
      Probably the filters in the espresso machine need changing.
      It’s all about to hit the fan.
      Get ready, duggers, Tomorrow go out and vote with your brain and your heart.
      We cannot allow this mish mash of English / Brit Nats to destroy our future.
      Vote SNP.
      This household will.
      PS Davidson was a giggling wee fool today at FMQ.

  5. Welsh Sion says:

    May offers a vote on a 2nd Euro referendum to the Commons.

    Do Davidson, Mundell, Wells et al. in Scotland support their Leader’s position or are they still going to maintain, ‘no-referendum-on-anything-no-way-no-how’, as per their election publicity?

  6. Charles McGregor says:

  7. Melvin penman says:

    What I love about this piece is that the Dug is helping people understand , what a colony Scotland is and that the Stockholm syndrome is coming to an end.
    The great colon maker (UK) is passing and all that will be left is a red white and blue ,faeces on the floor.

    Great stuff

  8. Steviesparkie says:

    When I heard may was brining back a bold new deal I presumed she only meant the FONT…

  9. Macart says:

    I think they’ll wheel Broon out a few more times yet in the coming months. And every time they do?

    People should just laugh. No rage. No fear or trepidation. Certainly not awe or wrapped silence. Just pity and laughter. I can’t think of anything that would be more unbearable to that ego, or a more fitting punishment for what he did to Scotland’s population.

    On May’s deal? Couldn’t agree more. Though it has left Ruthie in a bit of a bind over ‘no more referendums… ever’. Apparently she’s also had a change of heart on working with BoJo. She is consistent (sigh) and more than a little predictable.

    Yup! Consistent is a word we can use there. 😎

    • Anne Martin says:

      Do you mean consistently inconsistent? 😂😂

    • Bob Lamont says:

      Agreed, Brown’s selection as emissary would certainly stroke his oversized ego, but it yet again demonstrates the fundamental disconnect in the London mob over whom the Scots might respect and listen to.
      As to the Mooth, possibly continent might also be appropriate, full of wind and……

    • Douglas says:

      Sadly, I agree His Brooness will get roped in for an intervention again. It seems to me that somebody must have some dirt on him, or otherwise he would not subject himself to such regular humiliation!

  10. Alasdair Macdonald says:

    We have had the diplodocus and the Art Galleries and the tyrannosaurus is at the Kelvin Hall and the Glasgow public has been turning out in their thoosans to see them, so, someone in SLAB must have thought there is a market for this so we will display the Broontosaurus. However, unlike the Art Galleries which is free and the Kelvin Hall where you pay at the door, the SLAB exhibition was in a secret mini-venue (in Hope St) and people were only allowed in if they could say the password.

    However, interestingly, and probably revealingly, ob Reporting Scotland the event had more air time in the programme than was afforded to the SNP, Green, LibDems, Tories and Brexit put together, although the latter got publicity via the ‘speech’.

  11. Luigi says:

    My My! The BREXIT chickens are certainly coming home to roost. The entire set up is fragmenting before our eyes. The most telling effect has been the complete exposure of the workings of the British establishment, and it’s not a pretty sight. The Scottish tories have now been exposed more than ever before as a bunch of pathetic charlatans, trying to act tough one minute and then quickly falling in line to kiss the backside of Mother Theresa when the wind changes direction. And as for the red tory fence-sitters and the yellow tory opportunists – well “unreliable” and untrustworthy” immediately comes to mind.

    The Ides of May beckon for the British nationalist politicians in Scotland. The public are watching. The soft NOs are watching. 🙂

  12. Welsh Sion says:

    Soon be June … the end of May …

    • Bob Lamont says:

      Unfortunately that is not the real problem in this very British coup… Farage has prepared the ground in advancing the more extreme Conservative cause, with the lid which was May removed, the Westminster pantomime will take on a distinctly more ugly if more smiling form…

      • Welsh Sion says:

        Don’t worry, Bob Lamont – I’m no Farageist nor supporter of any successor of May’s (who is bound to be worse.) I just hope that Scotland launches her lifeboat soon, and that my own country will do so pretty soon thereafter, as well.

        Now where did I leave that milkshake … ?

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