The sightlines of the prams

So here we are, a month out from the Tory Leadership Referendum with its potential side effect of taking the UK out of the EU, there’s the possibility of legal action against the Conservatives over driving a coach, literally, through election expenses laws which could result in the government losing its majority, there’s the distant rumbling of the Chilcot Report which should, if there’s any justice, see Tony Blair and Jack Straw named and shamed for taking the country into an illegal war. There is no shortage of news stories which ought to boil the blood of anyone who retains a couple of functioning neurones, and yet if you look at the papers, the most important events today are who Stewart Hosie has been shagging, a fitba match that took place two days ago, and the competition between George Osborne and Boris Johnson about who can tell the scariest story. The only responses from a sane person are respectively, don’t care, don’t care, and get a bloody grip. No wonder our media is going down the toilet.

The tale of Stewart Hosie shagging someone who wasn’t his wife has dominated the Scottish press for the past week. You’d think that we’d been teleported back to the 1950s. Compare and contrast the treatment received by Stewart Hosie with that of Tory John Whittingdale MP, the minister in charge of press regulation and broadcasting. Whittingdale had an affair with a dominatrix whom he took to official functions on expenses, yet he’s still in office. If you look up double standards in the dictionary, you’ll find a wee note telling you to refer to the British press.

Whatever has gone on with Stewart Hosie and his sex life is a matter for him, his wife, and possibly his urologist, yet according to our newspapers it’s the most shocking political story since Watergate. Unless there is evidence, and there most certainly isn’t, that he’d been paying for prostitutes using government funds, or that he’d been engaged in drug fuelled binges with underage hookers, none of the rest of us have any interest. He’s broken no laws, he’s abused no expenses, he has not lied or cheated to his constituents. They didn’t marry the guy, he didn’t promise to be sexually faithful to them. Yet he’s been subjected to a barrage of stories in the papers that have led to his resignation. Funny that Whittingdale didn’t receive similar treatment eh.

You and me and the tabloids or the wannabe tabloids of the supposedly serious Scottish press have not been damaged, hurt, diminished or affected in any way by what Stewart Hosie has been getting up to in his time off. It’s no business of mine or yours what Stewart Hosie does with the hosie in his underpants. All that the story proves is that our media is irredeemably immature, and that if they keep being immature eventually they’ll hit a target successfully and end someone’s career, which just encourages them to continue to be immature. All the Stewart Hosie affair affair tells us is that the Scottish media is going to continue its journey down the toilet and round the U-bend of irrelevance. No wonder their readership statistics are getting flushed away.

The Scottish fitba establishment are spoilt little children with a vast sense of entitlement. In fact their sense of entitlement is inversely proportional to their competence, which makes it pretty vast indeed. The entire known universe isn’t large enough to contain it. The developing field of quantum computing relies on quantum states existing simultaneously in a myriad of different universes, and it’s only being developed in order to to calculate the sizes of the egos of Scottish football clubs. Anyone who has spent more than five minutes in this country knows that, and they also know that the sense of entitlement at the top of fitba translates into bad behaviour from fans who likewise think that 22 millionaires kicking a leather ball about and ruining a perfectly good lawn is more important than finding a cure for cancer. Although many of the rest of us wish that someone could discover a cure for fitba.

There was more immaturity on display on Saturday when Hibs fans invaded the pitch after winning the cup, some Rangers fans invaded back, and there was a wee spot of bother which it appears mostly involved some spitting and a couple of highly payed people getting shoved a bit, all to the accompaniment of sing-a-long-a-sectarianism. It’s now been transformed into the greatest scandal to hit Scotland since Stewart Hosie discovered that he has a functioning penis. If our media devoted a little less time to the egos of boys playing games, then perhaps they wouldn’t behave quite so badly. Just a wee suggestion there. The rest of us would certainly be a whole lot happier.

Today we had the latest episode in the European Union referendum saga, for anyone who hasn’t yet pulled their duvet over their heads and isn’t rocking back and forward in the fetal position banging their heads off the headboard. The Treasury has issued a report claiming that there are only two possible outcomes if the UK leaves the EU, utter ruin and devasation, or utter utter ruin and devastation. Meanwhile in a cunning conflation of anti-immigrant racism with Scottophobia the Leave campaign has claimed that if we remain in the EU then an army of Turks the size of the population of Scotland is going to invade the UK in order to make sure that the only job your kids will be able to get will be a zero hours contract in a call centre on the minimum wage, and destroy your health service. Although that’s pretty much what the Tories are aiming to do whether we remain a part of the EU or we leave it. Naturally all this is being reported in the UK press in calm and measured tones, or at least it probably is in one of those other universes accessible only to quantum bits in a quantum computer. Because it sure as hell isn’t happening in this one.

The vast bulk of the population remain steadfastly unaffected by the media’s hysteria and their immature views. It was claimed during the Scottish referendum by the selfsame Unionist media that Scotland was too immature to become an independent nation. We’re not. It’s our media that’s immature and infantile. There are babies who get a more balanced and grown up view of the world from the sightline of their prams.

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36 comments on “The sightlines of the prams

  1. David S. Briggs says:

    As you say Paul. Who cares.

  2. Dan Huil says:

    The britnat hysteria displayed by the britnat media will only sicken the vast majority of people in Scotland. The britnat media is just desperate to see division and violence in Scotland.

  3. As I have pointed out before, I stopped taking the Dead Tree Scrolls (The Herald for over fifty years) as a direct result of the Referendum, and in a normal democracy, that should have been that.
    I voted with my feet and my monthly DD.
    Yet, BBC Scotland, whose job it is to inform educate and entertain, floods my airwaves with ‘opinion’ from the archly Pro Unionist Project Fear collaborators which I and many tens of thousands rejected and do not want to hear from any more.
    We get them rammed down our throats, and subsidise their wages, because that’s the way it is. So there.
    Kieran Andrews of the Courier and the ubiquitous David Clegg of the Record joined Brewer yesterday smirking and sneering about Hosie.
    They really are pond life. (I know you guys read this. Repeat, you are pond life.)
    You’re spot on, Paul. The script didn’t pan out at the weekend.
    It should have been a RFC victory and a Unionist Fest of Union Jacks, and a 14 page pull out in HS and the Sunday Mail, and salivating speculation about whom RFC were going to meet in the EUFA Cup Final next season. There must be many a cathedral city breathed a sigh of relief.
    BBC Scotland has a gaggle of Unionist Churnos and Red Blue and Jaundiced Tory Advisers, with whom they regularly fill their News and Current Affairs programmes. Their views, despite the fact that we returned 56 SNP MP’s, and 63 MSPs and 6 Pro Independence Greens is all that matters.
    The ‘democratic will ‘ of the people doesn’t matter; Unionism is the only game in town, because that’s what the Scribes’ English and American neo conservative bosses demand.
    Blair Brown and Straw will get off with it.
    There will be a major scandal breaking first week in July, or Westminster will invade another country, for Freedom and Democracy. It will be a good week to bury bad news.
    The SE Establishment is corrupt to the very core, and is ably supported by the WATP Professor Tomkins, the queen’s Eleven Murdo Fraser, and the Torrance of Spin. Shit stirrers, and gravy trainers.
    Hibs won the cup BTW, RFC need two centre halves desperately.
    Great piece, Paul.
    Any sex scandals among the Dead Tree Scribes, I wonder?

  4. Macart says:

    That’s pretty much what I read from it all this morning Paul and it left me utterly disgusted. You sometimes fucking despair at our media. Chilcott’s pending report alone defines a time when we went to war, sending our troops into harms way on a lie FFS! Untold carnage and suffering rooted in the most awful example in parliamentary abuse and misuse of office in our recent history.

    An EU referendum which could have fairly immediate repercussions for everyone on these islands if not debated properly. An ongoing constitutional crisis in our own union which is being ramped up past eleven by the usual suspects and we’re fed a diet of the most hypocritical, superficial, daytime telly bullshit in an attempt to deflect from all of the above.

    There are days when you feel like turning your back on all of it and let them finish the job of turning our country into the dependent, cringe sodden, sewage pit they so desperately believe and want it to be.

  5. […] Wee Ginger Dug The sightlines of the prams […]

  6. Clive Scott says:

    A personal life is all well and good but what an astonishing lack of judgement on Hosie’s part. He is supposed to be down in the London cesspit to settle up, not settle in and be whoring around.

    • Michael says:

      Get a life. What consenting adults do in their private life is their business. Go and twitch yer nets.

    • hettyforindy says:

      Lack of judgement in not spotting the trap, the witch hunt continues, they went for the female SNP MPs first, not so successfully. The security services must be working overtime now we have so many SNP MPs, questioning the corrupt, dirty, stealing, lying, cheating establishment toffs in westmonster, with their liebour pals nodding like those dogs in car windows.

      Load of bastrds, I don’t see why S. Hosie should have resigned, he messed up, the establishment framed him, and are going for gold in the press, he should have stood his ground.

    • Norma Slimmon says:

      What is more astonishing is that you and the dead sea scrolls find news in it

  7. Johnny come lately says:

    Unfortunetly Hosie has given them the ammunition to shoot with.

  8. Bill Hume says:

    Only one small complaint. Fetal, should be foetal. Pedantic wee bastard or what??

    • weegingerdug says:

      Actually according to the Oxford dictionary fetal or foetal are both acceptable spellings in Commonwealth countries and fetal is the usual spelling in technical contexts even in UK English. Foetus looks prettier, but is without etymological basis. It was fetus in Latin. Pedantic wee bastard or what?

      • Saor Alba says:

        As a Biologist I absolutely concur with your statement WGD.
        BOTH are entirely acceptable. I would not consider you in any way a pedant.

        • Marconatrix says:

          I agree, WDG has a good grip on language. However I do feel the ´Hosie´ pun was regrettable, if only because it has stuck fast in my mind (does that tell you something about my mind, quite probably). How dare you add to the troubles of this fine upstanding member? U-bend if you want to, clearly the hosie´s not for bending … Oh dear!

  9. stewartb says:

    The contrast between how the BBC and Channel 4 has today covered The Treasury report on the UK’s economy post-Brexit is hard, even for a long term BBC critic, to believe. BBC Scotland news at 6pm referred to (I paraphrase) Cameron and Osborne spending their day “responding to” The Treasury report. So the PM and Chancellor respond to a report from a department of state which they effectively control? This news item was then followed up by a long contribution from a ‘modelling expert’ who explained how The Treasury would have produced its forecasts.

    I had heard this ‘expert’ on air earlier in the day but the BBC Scotland piece edited out his next comment that the results of the modelling are crucially dependent on the assumptions and judgements that are used by those running the models. So The Treasury forecasts are not nearly as authoritative and objective as the BBC Scotland coverage strongly implied!

    Channel 4 News tonight compared the percentage changes to the economy – i.e. the catastrophes – being predicted by The Treasury with trends and benchmarks already experienced or predicted for the UK economy. And given this context, the forecasts are not so catastrophically bad after all!

    I just hope that many more of the electorate in Scotland learn about what can and cannot be trusted in terms of the news media in good time for IndyRef 2!

  10. hettyforindy says:

    Yes, the footie thing is getting notched up, come on, the Scots are crazy barbarians, who would want then as a direct neighbour? Brrr.

    As for the Hosie case, should he have resigned. Who was the totty, a journalist? Trained by the establishment to seduce middle aged, away from home men, who happen to be SNP MPs, ripe for the picking. It all seems like some B movie, while the real corrupt gits get away with all kinds, drugs, prostitutes, god knows what else, and are viewed as real men for cheating on their wives.

    How many soft, weak guys would have done the same, and I am no fan of adultery, but by christ it is very common. Hosie was targeted, fell for the honey trap and the establishment will milk it for all its worth, after all, nothing else in the world going on is there? Like people starving in Africa, farmers killing themselves due to debt, due to the horrendous drought etc.

    Let’s just hope, that folks ignore the tittle tattle, and look at the bigger picture and what is really going on.

  11. lanark says:

    Aye, the press are up in arms over a bit of adultery and Cameron wades in with a snidey remark. Why didn’t he pipe up with a snidey remark to the Prince of Wales/Duke of Rothesay at the state opening? Or is Great British aristocratic adultery ok?

    As regards the fitba, who cares indeed? Turning up at weekends, singing songs and generally working yourself into a frenzy? Sounds like the new religion to me.
    Perhaps their ancestors were devotees of John Knox.

    Not for me thanks.

  12. Pentland Firth says:

    Hits all the marks, As usual. Thanks Paul,

  13. davidbsb says:

    Mr Hosie has resigned. But I note he was frequently consulted by media. I don’t watch the propbox, but even I have observed the frequent appearances by him.

    When we elected the deputy leader last year the choice was Angela Constance, Stewart Hosie or Keith Brown. But look at the talent we have now in our elected members. This may turn out to be an opportunity. The best politicians in Scotland are in our party. Some of the best MP’s in Westmonster are ours. We may be spoiled for choice. And the chosen representative will be putting our world view to the watching world. This unfortunate matter may turn out to be in Scotland’s interest.

  14. arthur thomson says:

    @ davidbsb

    Sound point. What about a woman in the role. Someone with the debating skills of a barrister.

  15. Kate Penman says:

    I agree absolutely with your article Paul! Well said!

    While I don’t at all condone extra-marital affairs, I believe that that is something between Stuart Hosie & his wife to sort out between them. It is for HIS WIFE to decide how to move forward with their relationship and has absolutely NOTHING to do with any of the rest of us! And to make a meal of it, as the media is doing, is to exacerbate an already difficult time for his wife and family. To sink so low as to milk this sad situation speaks volumes of the level to which the media has sunk in this country. And by doing that, the media defines just exactly which party the whole of the media supports.

    I don’t remember this level and length of interest in the paedophiles that are STILL being harboured by WM!! Why have they not been hounded out and persecuted and their families treated to ‘play by play’ accounts of the dirty deeds?? Adultery is one thing – child abuse is absolutely another thing altogether!!! Where was the outrage and the dismissing of the huge numbers of guilty parties?? And why have the papers not gone into long & gleeful lengths of the story of the labour MP assaulting a member of the voting public at the Referendum Polling Station! Adultery is one thing – assault is quite another! Or Alistair Carmichael and his court ruled penchant for lying??? The Memogate incident was plastered all over the papers for weeks – but the court case was NOT!! Did Carmichael do the decent thing and ‘step down’?? Au contraire, he dared the Orkney Four to take him to court and PROVE he was a liar! And when they did? WHERE WAS THE MEDIA then???

    As far as I’m concerned, Hosie’s lack of judgment hurt himself, and hurt his family. He didn’t hurt me. Nor any of the rest of his constituents. But he did what he thought to be the decent thing and he stepped down. In some ways I’m sorry about that because I felt he really was a top notch politician who cared deeply and sincerely for Scotland. The other two SNP MPS (ie Michelle Thomson) were also hounded by the press for WEEKS – even when it was clear the Police were not even investigating them. Rather than have their Party criticised, they stepped down. I haven’t yet seen a paper screaming “Michele Thomson not being questioned by Police!! We apologise for any aspersions we may have cast!”

    As for the football thing – it’s a GAME!! A too highly paid GAME!!! Controlled by the rich who are making more money off A GAME!!! But unfortunately, it is the state of the media now whereby they are not allowed to make any derisory comments about their pet ‘parties’ and there is really not much in the way of SNPBADDDD (apart from Mr Hosie & ‘friends’)! So they have to invent stories concerning the shenanigans of Saturday, and enhance other things that DID happen! All they are doing is stirring to make Scotland look like a parochial backwater that cannot POSSIBLY govern itself!! And I have to say – it’s not at all surprising that the media get away with that kind of nonsense, given that the Prime Minister of the UK made a stunningly cheap joke at the expense of Stuart Hosie’s family. If HE can do it, it’s hardly surprising that the media feel they can do it!

    Like someone here has already said – I really despair of this country and makes me want to pull the bedclothes over my head and declare myself finished with it all! However, then David Cameron would win. And I have NO INTENTION of giving him the satisfaction if winning if I can help it!

  16. tamanhijau90 says:

    Wow… Funny dog… hehehee.. nice to post bro

  17. punklin says:

    What’s with all this despair? Neither fetal nor foetal (and definitely not fecal) position sous le duvet pour moi! Sure, it’s a struggle but for masel’, I couldn’t be more optimistic that it’s comin’ yet for aw’ that… It being independence, by the way!

    • Ealasaid says:

      Sounds like they have scraped their way through the bottom of the barrel and are now digging a hole for themselves. Can you feel the fear? They have nothing else to fight us with and our SNP team are the best in Britain. Independence is indeed coming. So glad I now avoid MSM 🙂

      Another great article Paul. Running out of superlatives for you!

  18. Alasdair Macdonald says:

    One of the benefits of the referendum in Scotland has been the growth of an ‘alternative’ media, such as Bella, Wings, Newsnet, Common Space, etc. which are doing ‘rapid response’, recalling the previous statements of those being very holy, high-and-mighty so that we can see these statements for the hypocrisy that they are. In addition, despite what the Tories and Kezia (‘illiterate weans’) and Wee Wullie Winkie, claim the great mass of Scots who have attended comprehensive schools over the past 50 years, is pretty well educated and savvy. The readership of newspapers is plummeting, partly because the content is so dire and most people now recognise the ‘rich man propaganda’ being spewed out. Partly, it is due to bloggers and to the vast resource that is the internet enabling anyone to research something within a few clicks.

    Well done, Fido! (or, given your origins, Fidito or Perro!)

  19. Gus Coutts says:

    Re the impending publication of The Chilcot Report is it not the case that prior to becoming an MP Rory The Tory was was a senior administrator in that part of devastated Iraq that was under UK control.

    I may be wrong but was he not lauded to the skies by the media for the wonderful job he did.

    Given the recent leaks re the report’s contents it will be interesting to see how,post publication, the media will regard his performance in what seems to have been adjudged to have been an administrative . shambles.

  20. jcd says:

    Great article and good posts but it seems that what we’re doing is echoing what we already know to be the truth of the matter, i.e. totally corrupt and biased media. What I for one would really like to see is people coming up with concrete and effective big viewer/reader number strategies to cripple the msm in Scotland once and for all.

    I know they’re on a downward spiral as it is but who knows how long it could take to kill it altogether and who knows what might happen between now and then.

    A way to get round them or go over their heads and reach large numbers of viewers/readers must be found. It can’t be impossible to do and thinking outside of the box can lead to some fantastic outcomes.

  21. Robert Graham says:

    Paul your article more or less reflects most sane People’s view on the SNP’s Stewart Hosie , as per usual people in the public eye are subject to a degree of Scrutiny that is beyond belief it largely depends how many friends in the Establishment they have that governs the vilification they receive , The SNP are public enemy No 1 so they get the Special treatment .
    The Turks proposed entry into the EU is i believe a real problem not the jobs being taken from our kids that is just a sideshow , This Turkish Government are intent on destroying the only credible threat to ISIS the Kurds, they are the ones who need support , not this Turkish Government who continue to poke and prod a Russia who perceive that is being encircled by NATO and are not our best pals just now.
    This whole EU in/out vote could change in the blink of an eye if the Brexit campaign pursue the Turks entry into the EU we dont see the extent of immigration in the south , English people by and large are a pretty accommodating lot in most cases just the same as us .
    This Turkish entry could be a game changer and with the Tory party under severe pressure with this Election fraud investigation going on. the EU vote is not a done deal the English could very well vote OUT on the Immigration issue on its own .

  22. Don’t think they are many if any millionaires on the Hibs team

  23. says:

    Reblogged this on Bampots Utd.

  24. Jan Cowan says:

    I’m just very sorry Hosie fell for their nasty game. Davidbsb has the right idea, though. Fairly cheered me up.

  25. ron gillies says:

    But wait. It’s maybe not the most important story but it maybe the most interesting.

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