Gordie Broon has been intervening again. Gordie’s always intervening in something or other, possibly in atonement for the fact he could never be arsed to intervene in the affairs of his own constituency when he was MP for Kirkcaldy. The Labour party is currently at such a low ebb that it’s been reduced to taking lectures from Gordie on how to be popular and attractive to voters like he was an expert on popularity and getting people to vote for him. That’s a bit like having Margaret Thatcher lecture you on the importance of empathy and compassion in the social security system, or asking Rolf Harris to share the benefits of his wisdom on child protection.
Project Fear mark 2 is now in full swing. The election of a man who embodies the values of palaeo-Labour, the way the party was before dinosaurs like Gordie evolved, will be a cataclysm of epic proportions. Birds will fall from the skies. There will be plagues of frogs and locusts. The Queen will warn people to think very carefully and won’t be purring at all. And no one will be allowed to use the pound. People who support Jeremy Corbyn on social media are being condemned in the pages of the papers like Scottish independence supporters – that’s just how evil they are. How dare ordinary people engage with politics. It should be the preserve of the professionals. For the rest of us, just don’t dare imagine that political life is possible without the parasites.
Anyway, Gordie did his usual pacing up and down thing, giving a very good impression of a man who was chewing a rug. He never stands still when giving a speech as a subconscious reflection of his fear of ever being pinned down. It’s always difficult to watch Gordie in full flow, as in the average person he provokes the same sensation of creepy revulsion you get when watching a hauf cut university professor deliver a lecture with a urine stain spreading down his trousers. You’re repelled, but at the same time fascinated to see if he can get to the end without falling over. Gordie didn’t manage to get to the end of his time as prime minister without falling over, but he’s the only recent former prime minister who isn’t associated in the public mind with war crimes or child abuse so he counts as a success story for the British establishment.
Gordie didn’t fall over this time, sadly. Waving his arms about, he gave a thunderous speech warning of the dire terrors that would befall the Labour party if it succumbs to socialism and left wingery. He pledged that if Labour members vote for anyone but Jezza, Gordie will personally guarantee that whoever does win the leadership will deliver all their policy speeches via the medium of a Keir Hardie glove puppet. It’s the nearest thing possible to socialism in the modern Labour party.
According to Gordie that Labour party needs to be credible if it is ever to get elected again. This statement would be a bit more credible if it didn’t come out of Gordie’s gob. No one believes a word the man says. We remember his vow that he was personally going to guarantee, and then he buggered off under some rock. The only thing Gordie is guaranteed is that he’ll get fawning coverage on BBC Scotland, the last remaining bastion of true believers in the Cult of Gordon.
As he paced about, the thrust of his argument was that Labour risked becoming a party of protest, and wouldn’t be able to help the poor and vulnerable unless it gets into power. Unfortunately for this thesis, when Labour was in power under Gordie and his predecessor it didn’t do a whole lot to help the poor and vulnerable. Instead it presided over a regime of lax banking regulation, being terribly relaxed about the very wealthy getting very wealthier, and getting the public sector tied up in expensive contracts with private finance companies which we’ll be paying off for decades to come. Now the man who promised there would be no return to boom and bust is telling us that Labour needs to be credible. Gordie and Blair boom and bust the Labour party’s credibility.
What the Labour establishment and the mainstream media don’t get, can’t grasp, is that Jeremy Corbyn is popular precisely because he is universally condemned by the mainstream media and the Labour establishment. When you are condemned and derided by discredited individuals and organisations it only increases your credibility. You don’t start to believe again because someone you have already decided is a serial liar tells you to. In Gordie’s own words as he angrily rounded on Tony Blair after Blair had backed down on what Gordie thought was a commitment to stand down in Gordie’s favour – “There is nothing that you could say to me now that I could ever believe.” Now every time he opens his mouth, an entire population thinks the same way.
Every time Jeremy Corbyn is criticised by someone like Broon or Blair, another pile of votes add up in his favour. If people you hate hate someone, you’re more disposed to give that person a fair listening. That’s simple basic human psychology. The more that the careerists, the place-persons, the greasy pole climbers, the automatons and the plastic politicos line up to condemn him, the stronger he becomes.
And as they do so they are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. The usual suspects are complaining about infighting, as they fight like ferrets in the proverbial sack. They say that Labour will become unelectable if Jeremy Corbyn wins, and if he wins they’ll do their utmost to undermine him, to plot against him. The Labour right and the Labour establishment will do all it can to wrest power back from the party members, and they’ll destroy Labour in the process so that they can stand back and say – see we told you so. The losers will be those in England who believe in progressive politics, and in Scotland the final demise of Labour as a credible political force will only hasten the end of the Union.
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