Apres moi lied the stooge

So he’s still there. Aliestair Koalamichael hasn’t resigned and shows no inclination to accept the proper consequences for his wrong doings. He’s doing his damnedest to keep out of the public eye, with the exception of a tweet saying that it will all blow over. He’s going to keep out of the public’s way until it does. He’ll be a very long time hiding then. It won’t blow over for Aliestair and it doesn’t matter how long he tries to hide. The smearer has smeared himself, he’s stained his reputation indelibly. This is all he’s ever going to be remembered for, the only notable event in his undistinguished career.

Today Orkney and Shetland residents lodged legal papers at the Court of Session challenging his election, having received sufficient funds from public donations to enable them to start legal action. The fundraiser is still short of the total required however, so keeping donating.

Taking legal action is the only way that the people of Orkney and Shetland can get their say. For all the cant in the media and from politicians that the only opinions which are important are those of Aliestair’s constituents, the only way they can express their opinion is via the ballot box at a byelection. It’s Aliestair who is denying them the chance to do that. He says he wants to be judged on his record as a constituency MP, but it’s not up to him to decide what he gets judged on. That’s for the electorate of Orkney and Shetland.

But Aliestair doesn’t want them to judge him at all, he just wants to accept the power and the paypacket, he doesn’t want to pay the moral bill. He wants to sit as a legislator and tell the rest of us what the rules are, and what the consequences for breaking those rules will be – but he himself thinks he should be beyond them. That’s why his electorate have started their fundraiser, and that’s why today they’re lodging a case at the Court of Session.

The case may not succeed. The law is stacked in favour of the legislators. But even if Aliestair does survive the legal action, it still won’t blow over for him. From now until the day he dies, Aliestair will be the smeary lie guy. That’s what he’ll be known for, and what his obituary will say. In years from now when academics discuss the death of the Liberal Democrats and Aliestair’s role in it, his smear, the lie, and Aliestair’s refusal to accept that he should have to pay the price is all that will be mentioned.

His legacy is a lie and his reputation is a smear. He’s the Septic Bladder of Orkney. He’ll be the man who took the power but not the responsibility, which is the prerogative of the harlot through the ages. He’s the chancer who took the benefits but who refused to accept the cost. He’s the smug arrogant face of the ancien regime whose defenders claim that he should be allowed to remain in post as he’s all that stands between Scotland becoming a one party state – apres moi, lied the stooge.

Aliestair may yet survive, but this will never blow over for him. He has now attained the quite remarkable status of being the only politician the public take less seriously than Wullie Rennie. Everything he says in future, every public statement, every opinion piece, every intervention in a Parliamentary debate or contribution to a committee meeting, will be heard through the amplifier of his hypocrisy and deceit. All that will be heard is – “I’m a liar and a smearer.” The people of Orkney and Shetland are now effectively without a representative, as their representative only represents the reprehensible. Every time he makes a speech, every time he tries to make a point, it can be countered with one simple statement – “But Alistair, you’ve already admitted that you’re a liar.” No one need ever believe anything that he ever says again. The Northern Isles deserve better than that.

Because of Aliestair’s refusal to accept the consequences, he’s tainted what is left of his party and signed death warrant for the shattered remnants of what was once a proud Scottish political tradition. The Lib Dems are in an even worse shape than the Labour party, and things are pretty desperate when you realise that you are an object of Kezia Dugdale’s pity.

The party hasn’t helped itself with its attempts to defend him. Malcolm Bruce’s defence is that everyone lies so it’s fine for us to lie too. What they don’t seem to have realised is that it’s because they all think it’s fine to lie that we voted them out of office in May’s General Election. And since they’ve not learned yet, then there will be a further price to pay. Tavish Scott seems to have grasped that point now, with his attempts to distance himself from Aliestair by telling us how angry and upset he is. But not angry and upset enough to call on Aliestair to resign.

Tavish Scott may lose his seat in Shetland in next year’s Scottish elections, and wossisface might lose in Orkney – the MSP who is the nonentity’s nonentity. There are submarine trenches with a higher profile than Liam McArthur. Tavish tells us that Aliestair told him on the Sunday following the election that he’d been responsible for the leak. Tavish didn’t think to tell the rest of us or to tell the official investigation. Why did it take so long for the investigation to release its findings anyway?

Despite the British state, the Lib Dems, and much of the UK media rushing to his aid, Aliestair’s career is as good as dead. It’s not so much that they want to protect him as an individual, but the possible loss of Orkney and Shetland to an SNP MP deals a devastating blow to one of the Unionists’ favourite arguments against Scottish independence – the claim that Orkney and Shetland would prefer the tender mercies of Westminster and would reject Scotland. There has never been any evidence to support this claim, and should the islanders ever elect an SNP MP the scare would finally die an overdue death.

But in rushing to defend Aliestair they only make it more likely that the pissed off voters of the Northern Isles would return an SNP representative at the Holyrood elections next year, and in terms of destroying Westminster’s claim that the Northern Isles would secede from Scotland, that would be far more significant than a Westminster byelection in the islands. As has been constantly repeated by the SNP, the General Election was not about independence and did not provide a mandate for independence. That might not be the case with the next Scottish elections.

Public anger at the Lib Dems is growing with every day that Aliestair remains, and that makes it increasingly likely that the Northern Isles will vote for an SNP representative who is standing on a mandate for an independence referendum.

Donate to the Orkney and Shetland fundraiser so that the people of the islands really can get their say.

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39 comments on “Apres moi lied the stooge

  1. mumsyhugs says:

    Wow Paul – absolutely stunning bit of writing. You just capture the mood of ordinary folks so well – and I think the good people in Orkney and Shetland are discovering through their fundraiser that they’re not being left to fight this on their own.

    This isn’t about party politics or independence – its about expecting the best from our elected representatives and not being prepared to accept anything less – certainly not what this character has basically told us we can just suck up and like it. Maybe in the past, yes – but Scotland has woken up.

    Perhaps you could put up the link to the fundraiser again, just to keep it rolling and so that folks can access it easily.

    Hugs the the dug 🙂

  2. Pam McMahon says:

    Hopefully the deluge will begin to lap round their ankles at the Court of Session. The Tory/Lib Dem coalition was the government in charge of the Scotland Office at the time this lying election propaganda was aired, and bears the responsibility for its release. The Scotland Office is a UK government department, like the Home Office and the Foreign Office and acts under the same rules and regulations as other government departments.

    When this action comes to court, we can only hope that the advocates working for the electorate of Orkney and Shetland, call David Cameron, as head of the UK government at the time, to the witness box and to account.

    • Alan says:

      This all seems like new territory so who knows what’s possible but there have to be a few people out there thinking it would be interesting to have Mundell, Clegg and Cameron answer some questions under oath, the official investigation and the subsequent question dodging by these dodgy characters leaving so many questions unanswered.

      • gavin says:

        They certainly wont be bothered by questions from the likes of BBC Scotland or the printed media.

        • Jan Cowan says:

          No indeed, Gavin. Have you read “LONDON CALLING” How the BBC stole the Referendum
          BBC BIAS written by GA Ponsonby? It’s a must read for every honest person.
          Another brilliant article, Paul. Thank you.

  3. daibhidhdeux says:

    Carmichael shuckin’ and jiving into eternal infamy in the Scots history books to come. Quite a feat given the competition he’s up against.

    Move over, Hamish Murphy. Like the “Beast of Bolsover”, your spot has been taken over.

    Feckin’ remarkable.

    Who’s up next in this very British “Game of [Perfidious] Thrones”?

    Mundell? “Woofie” Davidson as his handers? La Dug, the “Skeletor”‘s former bag-woman? Wee Wullie Rennie, Westminster’s wee nyaff sock puppet at Holyrood?

    Does this go all the way to the top of Britain’s imperial chain of command?

    Mmm…Fascinating times.

  4. gavin says:

    Once, the world was Liberal. Like the Bourbons, they were everywhere. And like the Bourbons, “they have learned nothing, they have forgotten nothing”.
    As the Whig Party went from the era of Grimond to that of Thorpe, they left behind any moral compass they might have once had. The radicals and reformers were now conservative, and toadies to the powerful.
    Handmaidens to Labour and Tory centrist regimes, while pretending to want federalism.
    They could have joined the SNP in 2007 and made constitutional history—-Scotland would certainly have voted for Federalism in any ballot—an option they were offered. Instead they preferred to be a historical footnote. A bluff called.
    Now we enter the end game of Scottish Liberalism—-a Scottish Secretary indulging himself in a nasty and vindictive personal attack on the First Minister of Scotland, then lying to cover up his offence.
    His defence? “He is just a big daft boy” somehow wont wash. He may well be glaikit, but he isn’t stupid. Previous Fiscal to trade, cannot pretend to be ignorant of the law.
    There’s a nasty whiff in the air, and it ain’t cheese.
    As in Watergate—its the cover up. Who knew what and when ?

    • fillofficer says:

      mmmm…that got me salivating, bourbons – haven’t had one for years, but to be serious, you make a very good plot for a blockbuster movie there, twists, turns, baddies, more baddies, red herrings, pilchards…got it all

      • gavin says:

        If they make a movie, I want to play Robert Redford.

        • fillofficer says:

          sorry, u took that too far, but your original article was spot on

          • David McDowell says:

            Sorry, gavin, Robert Redford has already signed up for a role in MEMOGATE: THE MOVIE.
            He’s playing David “Fluffy” Mundell. I know! Typecasting again!

  5. […] Apres moi lied the stooge […]

  6. macart763 says:

    Superb Paul and well said.

    Ten years ago had anyone asked me my opinion on the Lib dems, I’d have said well intentioned, honest and essentially folk you could deal with. I may have disagreed with their stance on federalism, but on getting things done, I’d have thought them far more approachable than the other two establishment parties.

    Today? Well today I see no redeeming qualities whatsoever. They have betrayed everything and everyone they ever stood for and with.

    A quote from today’s National on the roundly criticised Smith recommendations:

    “It is a step change in devolution that will make the Scottish Parliament one of the most powerful devolved legislatures in the world. It will ensure that we are responsible for raising the majority of the money we spend while protecting positive things we share across the whole UK.” “We should also be clear about what this Scotland Bill is not. It is not Full Fiscal Autonomy, as defined by the SNP and others.” (Willie Rennie)

    A party of federalism…. not so much any more apparently.

    And still he beats the party and BT line that has seen all establishment parties comprehensively rejected by the Scottish electorate. Clearly Mr Rennie is completely incapable of comprehending the meaning of the term landslide when applied to politics.

    This party and its representatives deserve no second chances.

    • Saor Alba says:

      Mr Rennie is simply incapable of comprehension. Full stop.

      • macart763 says:

        He does have a focus problem.

        As in a problem focussing on anything going on around him.

        Who chooses to ignore the fact that all but three seats in a country have quite clearly rejected the policies of establishment parties? A man who then compounds that startling oversight by stating that no action will be taken against a proven liar and abuser of office, completely overlooks his own culpability in the very same episode, and then caps this sterling performance by restating a policy position that saw his party utterly decimated in a general election.

        Seriously, what kind of utter buffoon does all of the above then pleads for a second chance?

        Rhetorical questions of course…

  7. oscartaime says:

    I use a text reader to listen to your posts & it is becoming harder & harder to hear Carmichael described as an “A-Lister”.
    May I humbly suggest B-Lister or perhaps more accurately D-Lister Carmichael. He is certainly a D list politician if ever there was one. Thanks

  8. oscartaime says:

    Thanks that should already sound better.
    Bon wknd 😎

  9. mumsyhugs says:

    I must admit I’m amazed how far we’ve come since this time last year. Who could possibly have predicted we’d have our own daily and weekly newspapers, magazines in all sorts of formats, news outlets etc – and the sovereign people of Scotland would be taking a former sosfs to court! And who knows what else will have transpired by the 2016 elections. Interesting times indeed 🙂

  10. barpe4 says:

    Great article again, you do really catch the mood.

    I would like to know what happens now after the papers were lodged, if the hoped-for resignation doesn’t happen? Is it just a matter of waiting to see how quickly the wheels of justice turn?

  11. Capella says:

    I’m concerned that he will now stand down to avoid the courts. I want to see the main players in the witness box under oath. Who did what, who knew what, when and where?
    It looks to me as if the main beneficiaries are the Tories and the big losers are Labour. The Lib Dems are like the Tories “fags” once again.

    But why are Labour keeping their heads down?

    • Polscot says:

      That would be an ideal result and some residual whiff of honour may be obtained by standing down. At the moment my glass is less than half full. I suspect that Aliestar Koala will, in addition to costing GBP1.4MM to the tax payers, also lose the foodbanks a substantial donation, more spondulas than his “foregoing” of his redundancy payment. What a result for the honourable upright member. I do hope that I am wrong.

    • Muscleguy says:

      Now the petition has been lodged he cannot avoid it by resigning as the petition addresses his fitness as a person to hold electoral office and one possible sanction is being barred from standing for elected office. Him resigning will affect the need for that ruling not at all.

      Then there’s the parallel police investigation that could for eg end with him being charge with malfeasance in public office. Again resigning gets him out of that not at all.

      Should he resign and seek to resume his legal career the Scottish Bar may well take a dim view of his fitness to practice. Staying as an MP and hoping against hope to weather the storm and that it will indeed ‘all blow over’ is all he now has left.

      Not to mention that every year of commons membership adds to his pension pot.

  12. fillofficer says:

    the only reason he aint budging is cos too many others are involved & cant call for his resignation. time to kick the leg away from the tower.

  13. Sue de Nymme says:

    For your delectation and amusement on this Friday evening, here is the state of the Lib Dumb’s disarray over their position on Aliestair’s disarray.


  14. macart763 says:

    Has anyone wondered about when rather than who?

    Bear with me.

    If this little scheme had been concocted pre purdah, then Mr Carmichael was a government minister and MP, yes? A member of Mr Cameron’s cabinet and SoS for Scotland. So the charge at that point would not be a Lib dem attempting to undermine a party political opposition, bad and bad enough, but a UK cabinet minister attempting to undermine the First Minister of a devolved administration.

    Now that, I think, is a different kettle of fish altogether and raises a whole basket load of new questions.

  15. andygm1 says:

    Alistair is merely the patsy who has been assured that he will bear no responsibility for his actions. An ermine jaicket awaits him in due course.

    The law in Scotland is still run by the establishment and I don’t expect them to upset any establishment applecarts. For this whole affair was undoubtedly concocted by the establishment to dish the nats.

    The best result would indeed be to force various Westminster politicians into the witness box under oath to discuss who said what to whom and when.

  16. The Scottish Play says:

    All Hail to Thee! . WGD.. so foul and fair a phrase I have not seen this ‘Septic Bladder of Orkney’….. throw in with this into the charm-ed pot ..the gall of the blaspheming liberal few… and the charms wound up…and thougn his seat him thinks cannot be lost, yet it shall be tempest-tost.

  17. Hazel Smith says:

    Another excellent article. Hats off to you and the wee ginger dug.

  18. The Vole says:

    Reblogged this on The Orkney Vole and commented:
    The only Dug that this Vole likes.

  19. grizzlepuss says:

    Thanks Paul for expressing in tone what we (the sane & honest) think. Succinct as usual.

    You allude to this nonsense that we keep hearing about SNP domination in Scottish politics, notably that feared if O&S, the last perceived bastion of anti-nationalist voters, falls to the bad alicsammin party.

    Apart from anything else, the fear of that democracy thing eh, it’s a damnable!

    But I say to all those that still cannot work it out:-

    Scottish politics is changing, it needs to, and clearing out the unwanted while beating a path to a new consensus is what Scotland has stated loudly in the majority that it wants.

    The best analogy that I can think of for all those stuck in ‘one party state’ fear mode; it’s a bit like making a Spanish omelette.

    First you need to break the eggs and make a unified mixture.

    Then, once the setting is established you add the different components and flavours.

    Simples. Harmony built around sound structure and containing variety.

    Anyone feeling hungry?

  20. WRH2 says:

    The Dug reminds us of the claim,”that he should be allowed to remain in post as he’s all that stands between Scotland becoming a one party state – apres moi, lied the stooge.” What the Tories, LieDums and the other lot try to ignore is increasingly people feel there is no one else to vote for. There is no other party that has Scotland’s interests at heart or to put it another way, apart from the SNP no other party is truly interested in Scotland. Their elected MPs were only interested in being in Westminster but not so that they could ensure Scotland was well served. But the huge movement to the SNP hasn’t just happened in the last two years, it’s beginnings stretch back to before the 2007 Holyrood election results. The Labour and LieDums response to that was to sit back confident we would see sense and vote the right way the next time. Their only activity in the interim was to develop their vitriolic and toxic hatred of the SNP. Did any of them seriously think that would do the trick?

    • grizzlepuss says:

      Although a member of the SNP, I’d be the first to complain loudly if going forward we did not have a varied mix at Holyrood, and I feel strongly that a good many folks are with me on that one.

      Politics thrives under good challenging debate.

      Westminster, now there’s a different situation.

      For me there will only ever be one kind of voice acceptable in that place representing me, and it has to be one who’s roots are firmly fixed in Scotland.

      Currently, and for wholly unbiased reasoning, that is only via the SNP.

  21. The Vole says:

    Thanks very much for your support on this. You have been a good friend to us – and that we appreciate under the barrage of vitriol aimed at us. Contributions to help Carmichael on his way can be made here https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/the-people-versus-carmichael/x/10726364#/story

    • mumsyhugs says:

      And you’re just £40 short of £50,000 as of a couple of minutes ago! You’re not alone 🙂

      • The Vole says:

        Incredible innit!! – so many people – there is no way that the petitioners could have done this without massive support. It means so much that it is not from any political party but from people, real people.

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